i'm keen on going through the camera after brooks has walked around the house with it. today it was a little bit different. in an extra good sorta way. he took a lot of pictures of me during today's photo session, which gave me a bit of a peek into his 2 year old head. here i am, once again, nursing the baby. making dumb faces. saying cheese. encouraging his independence. and- here he is, waiting for a turn on mom's lap. laughing at mom's faces. making mom smile. and showing mom he can push the button all by himself.
in my own head, i'm the sandwich maker, the laundry doer, the bum wiper, the bath giver, the happy meal buyer, the book reader, the tantrum soother, the spit up cleaner, the in bed put backer and the ouchy kisser.
in his head i'm mom. works for me. Y
saying cheese for pictures doesn't actually make you smile. when you're 2, it makes you look like you're saying cheese
once upon a time there was a little girl named goldilewis who was feeling very tired and overwhelmed because of her two little sons. one evening she decided to get away from it all and went for a little walk through the woods with her trusty sidekick- her dog theobent. as they were happily skipping along, they came across a little cottage and decided to go in to see if they could further their search for a complete escape from reality within.
the first room they entered was called a crafeteria in central phoenix. in the back gravel parking lot, goldi and theo picked over the tables of handmade goods. holding overpriced beaded bracelets up to the blinding floodlights, goldi would declare she was "bookmarking" something if it met her approval. such as wood press calendars: and funky doll head jewelry: however, after an hour, she declared, "this place is TOO SIMILAR to my real life. we need to get out of here before i actually start buying some of this crap". and so off they fled, the little girl and her silly puppy, across the dark and shady intersection into the next part of the cottage.
through this cheery red door, goldilewis and theobent entered a room they would never forget. no matter how hard they tried. it would haunt them in their weakest hours. forever. and ever.
it's called the cherry bar and it's full of more despair than an elephant's graveyard. theobent was the one holding the leash on this one. this is a special place where old married men go to hang out with other old married men. there are no games playing on the tv's. only an ashtonkutcher flick where he might as well have been shoving his fist in his mouth. we were the only women. we might as well have worn shirts saying "prop 8 is great" or "i choo, choo, choose prop 102's". they knew we weren't lesbo's and i don't think we were dressed cute enough to be confused for trannies. they knew we were there to spy and pass judgement and pollute their space with our foul boob scent.
goldilewis, through nervous giggles, whispered, "this place is TOO DIFFERENT from my everyday existence. let's get out of here, bathe ourselves in bleach, and find a happier retreat". and so off they sped, through a parking lot full of american made mini trucks, to the last room in the cottage.
based on previous experiences with the restaurant, fez, goldilewis and theobent were nervous this last stop would be a cherry bar repeat. it wasn't. the little girl and her puppy pal ate phyllo dough pockets, amazing pesto salads and bittered diet cokes while nestled snuggley in a table between two gorgeous men sharing an appletini and a table full of japanese kids fresh off a tour bus. ahhhh. mecca. the two sat happily and discussed art, high school stories and the occasional mention of our husbands and children.
with a clink from the glasses, "this place is JUST RIGHT".
"but staying home with the kids is a full-time job". whatever. when i worked, i at least got to sleep in on sundays, take a full one hour lunch break and never once did i have a boss throw a toy car at my head. jobs and motherhood can't even be compared but my husband is still trying to weigh it out.
here's the new one for the week:
"i wish i could go to the zoo and eat hot dogs and then come home and watch tv". ok. for the most part, things are pretty spectac but don't forget the full on bATTle it takes getting the 2 year old into the car, with a sippy cup and both shoes on the right feet. and don't forget about the window. timing is critical. if you miss the window, you've got to breast feed the baby on the bench in front of the tortoise. and you will notice the same sweaty guy doing laps around you, hoping your hooter hider slips.
hot dogs. i love tubed meat but for the most part, i crave spicy thai or a hearty salad laced with root vegetables. you know, non-toddler food. things not featured on the safari cafe's menu board. things that i can't heat up in my microwave. real, sauteed Brussels sprout, culinary skilled, skin on fillet, adult food. so while you pout over my spontaneous, calorie filled finger food, just know i'm dreaming of a meal served with white linens, that I don't have to clean up after.
i love being a stay at home mom. but i also loved an office of my own, 8 hours to work/surf the net with minimal interruptions and time in general to act like a big person. do i want to be back? no. am i envious of your spit up free attire and time to be alone? sometimes.
so, because of the realization that my "job" has doubled over the past three months and i've received nary a high-five, i'm giving myself a raise. the stay at home kind. -an etsy necklace -some low slouchy suede boots (not resembling anything from Star Wars) and -a wicked awesome train table
see ya at happy hour. btw- our son stopped taking naps and knows how to get out of his carseat. i think i'm going to get a new watch too.
this year, in an attempt to keep our heads above water in this year's financial toilet flush, we decided against the demands of our homesick hearts to stay in arizona for thanksgiving and save some cash for christmas travels.
what a crappy idea.
to me, these end year holidays are all about family. i miss my mom and dad very much. brandon and i totally turn into helpless, halfbrained, childlike zombies whenever we're in our parents' homes. we looove to be cooked for and cleaned up after and if they'd offer, i'd still let them wipe me. and with all of the stress we've piled on with these two babies, too much work and the woes of becoming grown ups, we really could've used the love/pampering. just 4 more weeks and the real fun can begin!
now that the sob session has calmed, here's the number one thing i've been grateful for this year: my neighborhood family. if i can't be with my blood, i'm glad to be surrounded by these people. unlike most of the world, i know my neighbors. i know ALL of my neighbors. there are 40 homes in our community and at some point everyday, i'm hanging out with someone from the hood. i wouldn't have survived this year without the amazing babysitters, recipe club parties, sunday evening bbq's, emergency shop-vac assistance, 3 week post partum meals, impromptu playdates within walking distance, and long winded venting at the mailbox. good thing none of our homes will ever sell in this economy- couldn't handle the social life changes.
neighbor dean hosted the turkey dinner because he's the best cook. just ask him. seriously, he's italian and he knows his skills are inherited. holy crap. i'm getting fat just thinking about his food.
south side of the table
jonelle missing her family too. thanks skype!
when brooks grows up i'm pretty sure he wants to become a tweenage girl. they're his besties these days
suprise baby shower for jonelle with the neighbors.
and let's not forget the best part of thanksgiving weekend... putting up my girlfriend, the tree. hello pretty- it's been nearly a year since i've seen you. sorry about all the extra fat. i just had a baby.