Friday, December 5, 2008

-I'm demanding a raise

"but staying home with the kids is a full-time job". whatever. when i worked, i at least got to sleep in on sundays, take a full one hour lunch break and never once did i have a boss throw a toy car at my head. jobs and motherhood can't even be compared but my husband is still trying to weigh it out.

here's the new one for the week:

"i wish i could go to the zoo and eat hot dogs and then come home and watch tv".

ok. for the most part, things are pretty spectac but don't forget the full on bATTle it takes getting the 2 year old into the car, with a sippy cup and both shoes on the right feet.
and don't forget about the window. timing is critical. if you miss the window, you've got to breast feed the baby on the bench in front of the tortoise. and you will notice the same sweaty guy doing laps around you, hoping your hooter hider slips.

hot dogs. i love tubed meat but for the most part, i crave spicy thai or a hearty salad laced with root vegetables. you know, non-toddler food. things not featured on the safari cafe's menu board. things that i can't heat up in my microwave. real, sauteed Brussels sprout, culinary skilled, skin on fillet, adult food. so while you pout over my spontaneous, calorie filled finger food, just know i'm dreaming of a meal served with white linens, that I don't have to clean up after.

i love being a stay at home mom. but i also loved an office of my own, 8 hours to work/surf the net with minimal interruptions and time in general to act like a big person. do i want to be back? no. am i envious of your spit up free attire and time to be alone? sometimes.

so, because of the realization that my "job" has doubled over the past three months and i've received nary a high-five, i'm giving myself a raise. the stay at home kind.
-an etsy necklace
-some low slouchy suede boots (not resembling anything from Star Wars) and
-a wicked awesome train table

see ya at happy hour.
btw- our son stopped taking naps and knows how to get out of his carseat.
i think i'm going to get a new watch too.


Julianne said...


MSB said...

YOU SO DESERVE IT! All of it... and probably anything else you can think of. Especially since he stopped napping so young! Naps are sacred here. I still force my 4 year old to have "quiet time" so I can have mommy time.

Brooke said...

This post cracked me up! I'm having a love/hate relationship with staying at home with the kids lately, but I will for sure have to go back to "work" in a few months and I hate the idea of that even more. Sometimes I don't know what we were thinking having 3 kids so close together...

Steph Bowen said...

I bought some new workout pants from victoria's secret (a total splurge for me) and I've been feeling guilty about it... now, I feel much better 'cause I'm calling them my raise :) And for goodness sakes, they're being used to work off the weight that came from the things that's given me the full-time mom job! You're totally my favorite blog to read. When I grow up and turn 31, I want to be just like you.

Laurel MacD said...

Long overdue - and if you can convince Brandon to "get it", let me know how you did it.

The Stars at Night...Deep in the Heart of Texas said...

You are preaching to the choir. Preach on girlfriend. Amen. Amen.

Broadobalds said...

I sent the gay pics to your> email.